Don’t feed your Demons

There’s demons inside all of us and we can be not aware of it.

In an age of increased awareness of mental health, I find it absolutely necessary to discuss to be aware of your thoughts. You can either control it, or be controlled by it. You choose whether you take a passive stance to let it grow or to actively fight against it and keep it small. Yes, there is a high chance it won’t go away ever, it will come back and linger, but just as if you starve it to death by giving it no attention or idleness to feed on, if you give it one hint of entertainment it will have any ground to nourish it’s power over you.

How do you starve it? Communicate your demons to others, to people you love especially. Let people understand so they can handle you well and care enough for you, to dispel your fears and soothe your hurt everytime it comes back. A memory is the past, it’s addicting to focus on it because you there is an absolute you can predict, but if you do you magnify what has already passed, you will only take another stab of what can’t be changed. A demon doesn’t have a reputation for what it is when you can overpower it by yourself. Humans have powers by numbers, even the Bible claimed this:

Genesis 11:6 states:

The Lord said, “If as one people speaking the same language they have begun to do this, then nothing they plan to do will be impossible for them.

Where you put your heart on it will be your priority, where your priority is is where you’ll give your time. If the the past hurts and you keep reminiscing on it, you do nothing but disfavor to your present, future, your heart and mind. You prioritize a demon that brings you absolutely no good but to turn your life to the worse while you will fail to realize the that love surrounds you. Make no mistake, yes you can be blinded by it. It maybe comfortable to bask on self-loathing but it’s not worth the trade for the longer run.

People love and people care. Out of all the 800 friends listed on your Facebook, at least 3 will try to care for you. And those 3 will be worth the courage to be transparent.

Not all people are communicative unfortunately. So for those who love, keep asking, keep reassuring. Learn to dig for dirt that was burried under deep, provide security and confidence. For those that are silent, take courage and speak. Love surpasses all risks and fears. Don’t ever forget, Demons feed on being alone, failure to communicate and feeding your fear. That is how a downfall begin: To your esteem, to your thoughts, your relationships and ultimately, yourself.

Don’t wait till you lose everything, start being aware of what your thoughts are. There is no demon too great to overcome if you’re not on his side anymore. Rally your friends and family, your loved ones and you will triumph guaranteed. I lost what I treasured to a Demon inside the mind. Don’t wait to lose yours, there’s no benefit to either you or everyone else around you when you let it linger and take root in your life.

The first step to healing is acceptance.

4 Ways to Gift Love

Now that it’s Christmas it is the season of giving gifts. Ironically, other people give gifts that hold no thought or just throw random things for the sake of keeping tradition. To say no one wishes for anything in Christmas can be highly doubted, though there are a few exceptions. Most of the time it pays to pay attention that maybe, what they wasn’t isn’t material goods but something out of the physical realm to be received. Other people feel alone though with a lot of items and tokens. So, one of the sure and best ways to make the Christmas warmer while getting big on savings is making sure you make them feel love and appreciated instead. So without further ado here’s a list of some of the ways you can definitely tell them “I love you” more than just saying it.

Give Time

I personally don’t like talking with my dad about sensitive issues. But when push comes to shove, I know it’s a must. Although counter intuitive at first that it may push me away, as his son, it actually has positive consequences. My parents aren’t the most eloquent person to communicate so you’d definitely feel the art of trying. Yes, at the start I feel like it’s a waste of time, but every after end of our discussions, I definitely feel the love because I know he got out of his way from his comfort zone to make sure I grow right according to what he knows is good.

Another alternative to this is to spend time outside of where you can be focused on in either a new or comfortable environment, take them on a wonderful journey in the season of lights and the breeze, it doesn’t give any memento to keep on your stash but the memories and the feelings definitely stay for a long time. I wouldn’t mind not getting a jacket as long as I have a hand to hold or probably a head on my shoulder to warm me up in the wonderful holiday.

Serve the extra mile

Yesterday, I didn’t have much to do other than to stay home alone and play my games but before I had the chance to, my mom asked me if I can go with her to a funeral. While this is coupled with the fact that I am having diarrhea matched with long drives on the road, I weighed in that moment that giving her time this December was heavier than my comfort. I was glad to take her places rather than letting her go alone in this horrible December traffic, if you focus on what was given rather than mere present like how you feel and what you want, it’s easier to accomplish the task with a cheerful heart. It’s definitely clear when you’re doing it voluntarily or by force, so take note of your mood. In the end, she really appreciated my effort even stating to consider it as a Christmas gift already. (Take note boys and girls!)

Communicate your story

Tell them “good morning”, “I love you”, ask them “how are you” and tell them what your life is like for the day or the week. People you love like knowing what you’re up to. Communicating is a constant process but doesn’t need to be every minute, but starting and ending is definitely preferred.  In the age of social media where it’s second nature to post short “tweets” and “updates”, to send one to your special someone shouldn’t be so hard. Worse case scenario is you’re posting on those sites and that’s where they get their update. Gist is to recognize them as an integral part your life. It is one of the most sought after feelings in this word to be recognized and to be anyone has a huge gap compared to being someone in your life. Make them feel they are part of your journey than just a spectator. To communicate takes less time but more thought on how you give the message.

Write words

A Christmas card is nice but to write on a photo is definitely on a different level. I am a firm believer in the power and authority of words to build up and tear down. Still up till today, letters are my favorite gifts to receive other than really expensive ones that fit my wish list. A photo encapsulating a memory with the recipient rather than a card really puts the thought at 99.9% while costing so much cheaper than what you possibly might have rushed for. Don’t write generic wishes, put your personality into it, be honest as much as possible and craft your words in the warmth of your relationship. Items may be wonderful for a time but wears out or shelved after sometime soon, but good words that make them feel will last forever.

Knowing their love language doubles the effect of what you do. It pays to know how they feel loved the most, so if you really want to go big, get them to take the test. It’s free online! To those of you who’s trying to save up on investments and for the future, trust me when I say: That when someone loves you, the greatest gift is to make them feel you love them back. Amongst all the gifts I received, the best ones I will treasure aren’t the ones I can hold, but the ones that encourage, appreciate and the one that holds thought to who I am to them.

Happy Christmas gift planning!

 

Day 99 of Awareness: Sickness

Maybe things aren’t going your way, not the way you have planned. It sucks, but it doesn’t have to. It all depends what perception you’re going to use in the situation.

I’ve been sick a whole week last week; and sleeping for hours with 15 minutes interval of consciousness isn’t exactly a life anyone would want especially on how shitty it feels to have a migraine that makes me faint in pain and a body that doesn’t want to work. But here’s the thing about sickness, you could choose to see it as being a paralysis from doing the things you want, or the opportunity to do the things you fail to do with your busy life. I couldn’t do work, but I was able to do something that I haven’t done for a long time which I believe is important but never got to enforce in my life.

Prayer.

You see, I’m a Christian and I believe in the power of prayer to a supernatural God, and as someone that has been in romantic “relationships”, I have seen the necessity of communication to fall deeper. It was a good moment to bask in the supernatural for once in a long time and it really changes the perception of an individual from a genie, to a friend.

Whether you do believe in God, it pays to reflect on your life without the ability to be busy, to figure out where you are, where you want to go and if you’re at the right track. I do believe that prayer whether out of context Biblically, to psychologically throw the stress and weight of your shoulder to a good faith pays off.

My instance was sickness, I hope that when things don’t fall into your plans that you see, everything happens for a reason and there’s always a silver lining in the dark clouds. Don’t let sadness take you over, keep having an open mind, and maybe in another view, the sun would shine brightly down on you.

Day 64 of Awareness: Environment

I’ve been going to the gym lately and I realized how different it is that doing it at home.

As social beings (no matter how introverted you are), there’s a huge difference on your perception based on what surrounds you. At home, it’s easy to make the excuse of not doing a single exercise because, well, the laptop, the lack of equipments and the bed; After it comes to overcoming the initial inertia which is “going to the gym,” the motivation suddenly shifts from “Ugh, the gym.” to “Well, the gym.”

This principle is not necessarily applicable to all people or instance, but to those especially susceptible alteration and the lack of discipline, well, you and me pal.

There are probably two  channels that took a part of shaping your character and attitude: your internal conviction and external influence. As for internal conviction, let’s tackle that for another time. But you can be sure the internal is definitely affected by the external matters. So, mind where you are, where you spend your time and what compromises them the most, because if you don’t, you’re letting trash through your system without a filter.

Your environment does a lot to your subconscious, so pay attention. If you’re lazy at work: are you friends with the diligent teammates or are you with the whiny group? If you’re not thinking forward: are you with the people who think about how to pay the bills or the people who think of investments? Who you surround yourself dictates you.

As Jim Rohn said: You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.